Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Yo dont text me then not text me
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
i now understand why vodka
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize