Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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