I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
