sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Randomize
