your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I think I won the penis lottery.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
