we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
