Where is the hickey?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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