I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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