Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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