whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
