she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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