I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
