Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Randomize
