soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
