When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
