The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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