he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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