Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
