i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
