So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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