it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
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