Sponge bath it is.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize