she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
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