Are we in a gay sports bar?
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
