and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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