I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
