Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I understand Curling. That high.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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