So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
