i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
In other news, I just burned my penis
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
