Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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