is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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