oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
