I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
