There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
40s are totally the cure
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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