ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
