I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Dicks are not precious.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
