told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
