Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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