I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
