Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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