In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
