If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
