redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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