i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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