Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
