Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I had to cum in my sink.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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