There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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