I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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