this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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