I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
